Even if you wanted to turn and hide you couldn't, but you don't want to do that, you just can't help but stare because that's what you've been trained to do and you don't have the discipline to untrain yourself from these ready-made paths of thought that they lead you down put your hand in your pocket why don't you and when you get home turn that tv on and sit in front of it while you wait for someone to call you and make the emptiness seem acceptable. If you extract my brain you'll find it's as complete as yours and if you compare my soul you'll find an extra bit of growth that yours lacks, it grew out of necessity and absence and tried to be the part that yours found elsewhere, the part that gives you that sunny air.
The words are only coming out wrong because the world has been destroyed by stupidity and it is relentless inexhorable exhaustible far from adorable abhorrent stupid stuff, you swallow it whole. When I read over those pretty words of naive stupidity, the meaning is clear, and the meaning is rubbish, but if I ever read over these words of twisted nonsense I'll struggle to understand what on earth was falling out of my fingers and why it fell in that peculiar way, I've had such a particular day which saw me sitting in a lecture theatre full of perfumed ladies and educated gents, old patrons and young upstarts, silly tarts dressed in leather and confusing 'prodigious' with 'prolific' in the final show of complete stupidity dressed up as intellectualism GET OUT OF MY WAY but thanks for showing us the show at least you know talent from tripe even if you don't know what the words mean.
The words were harassment back then but they are now nothing but embarrassment, and look at the nonsense I have to tolerate in return. If pretty pictures are flashed on the screen before me and the grotesque is what we find intriguing, then what was the problem anyway? One day a database will spew this crap out just as fast as the server can transform the nonsense into nuisance. Nonsensefallsoutofapachewebserveralldaylonglikeyougiveafuck. The words were so lovely that the writer was forgotten and the words were all that was treasured, so the writer threw the treasure into a trove and drowned himself while everyone else frolicked so happily, plucking words and pulling birds out of the database... get fucked and go to space I hate this place.
Spice Bun in the meantime, hun.
Tuesday 20 May 2008
Sunday 18 May 2008
unedited shite #348
SMILE! (it might never happen)
SMILE! (jesus loves you)
SMILE! (it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile)
bollox bollox bollox I SHOUT IN RETURN, even if I did get my capitalisation muddled, who are you anyway, you cynical whore? Words that mean so little that they should be annotated and edited and then annotated and edited again until some semblance of conformity has been imposed on them. WHAT ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO DO with my evening when I've spent the evening housechoring while others did something less boring with someone they find more interesting than anyone else in the whole wide worldwide web? There is nothing left but to mess up a blank page and hope that somebody notices the wonderful clean odour in the same way that they notice my wonderfully bright jumpers and intellectual sparkle.
If I say that word again, I'll have said it too many times. Who reads it anyway? Even if you read all of these words they'll fly right through you like radio waves and cosmic radiation, they don't come structured like a gnossienne or a gymnopedie but I wish they did sometimes. Such music can touch me so that I feel my soul pulling on my tear glands, and it's a strange feeling and one that I can't grasp.
After the mad dutch woman finished giving me her immediate impressions of Maria's well thought-out expressions, I was left wondering if there was indeed any sense in what she had said, and then everything became even more confused when the question was posed:
"Do you think she still has sex, at her age?"
And I had no idea what to say think or do but I laughed all the way to the next exhibition.
Words fall out of my fingers all day long, and you don't give a fuck: you'll just watch them fall.
SMILE! (jesus loves you)
SMILE! (it takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile)
bollox bollox bollox I SHOUT IN RETURN, even if I did get my capitalisation muddled, who are you anyway, you cynical whore? Words that mean so little that they should be annotated and edited and then annotated and edited again until some semblance of conformity has been imposed on them. WHAT ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO DO with my evening when I've spent the evening housechoring while others did something less boring with someone they find more interesting than anyone else in the whole wide worldwide web? There is nothing left but to mess up a blank page and hope that somebody notices the wonderful clean odour in the same way that they notice my wonderfully bright jumpers and intellectual sparkle.
If I say that word again, I'll have said it too many times. Who reads it anyway? Even if you read all of these words they'll fly right through you like radio waves and cosmic radiation, they don't come structured like a gnossienne or a gymnopedie but I wish they did sometimes. Such music can touch me so that I feel my soul pulling on my tear glands, and it's a strange feeling and one that I can't grasp.
After the mad dutch woman finished giving me her immediate impressions of Maria's well thought-out expressions, I was left wondering if there was indeed any sense in what she had said, and then everything became even more confused when the question was posed:
"Do you think she still has sex, at her age?"
And I had no idea what to say think or do but I laughed all the way to the next exhibition.
Words fall out of my fingers all day long, and you don't give a fuck: you'll just watch them fall.
Wednesday 14 May 2008
What am I su-posed 2 dae?
What is ne1 su-posed 2 day when 4am comes and the eyelids are open before breakfast is even ready? Get chocolate weetabix minis and cover them in chocolate milk before your body even knows it's not yet breakfast time, and feel like you're having a midnight feast shortly before dawn and not much later after midnight. If Nelly Furtado could hear that tune, she'd go nuts.
For the sake of random writing I disconnect the part of my mind that focuses on threads and let my fingers wander around the fragments of sentences that jostle around in my head. Ever seen a broken mirror? That's an image that will stick with me forever, and I will spend forever trying to dodge the obvious connotations and seek far deeper-reaching objective correlatives when I drop words onto screens and into your minds.
This is unmoderated and unedited, unlike everything else, this is half-baked like an Asda doughnut that you think you might like until you realise that it's not at all good, but then you argue with other people who think it's divine. Loneliness is cleanliness, and clean living throws light on all the parts of the body and mind that had previously been forgotten.
6 am has come, and I can now rise and shine more brightly, Brighton is my destination and Europe is still my playground. nonsense nonsense nonsense likeugiveafuck.
For the sake of random writing I disconnect the part of my mind that focuses on threads and let my fingers wander around the fragments of sentences that jostle around in my head. Ever seen a broken mirror? That's an image that will stick with me forever, and I will spend forever trying to dodge the obvious connotations and seek far deeper-reaching objective correlatives when I drop words onto screens and into your minds.
This is unmoderated and unedited, unlike everything else, this is half-baked like an Asda doughnut that you think you might like until you realise that it's not at all good, but then you argue with other people who think it's divine. Loneliness is cleanliness, and clean living throws light on all the parts of the body and mind that had previously been forgotten.
6 am has come, and I can now rise and shine more brightly, Brighton is my destination and Europe is still my playground. nonsense nonsense nonsense likeugiveafuck.
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